A stone thrown
Breaks the mirror
Into a thousand pieces
I look at it
And I saw many faces looking back at me
Is that all me
Why are they staring back
The eyes,the face
Says a lot
As I picked a piece up
Blood oozes out of my hands
How nice it is
To see it flows out
To the outside world
But why do you want to come out
It's better inside
Or maybe it doesn't love the inside anymore
For the inside lies many misery
Maybe it couldn't stand the inside any longer
For it is filled with many lies
My heart ache
To see the state I am in
What am I doing?
Why am I torturing myself
When there's nothing to be suffered
In the first place
If only,if only
I could turn back time
I would have done everything
Differently
Different from what it has become
If i had the choice
I would leave everything behind
Goodbye pain
Goodbye......
I don't know why but everything from last year is coming back to me...Do you know that I didn't cry at all when I was diagnosed with diabetes...I didn't cry when I was asked to retain...I didn't cry when I had to retain...and it all happen at a time....within the short period of time...that's too much for me to handle..yet i didn't shed a tear then....I cried only a few weeks later...but the cries were shortlived for i feel it's stupid to cry...The actual fact is I'm still in denial...I thought everything's ok...BUt no...it's not...I'm not ok...I was never ok...with EVERYTHING...And it seems like everytime I try to be happy again...I invite more sorrow...Just what the hell am i doing now...serious...what the hell I'm doing...
I remember i read this from Hid's blog...something about a hug...I love hugs...It just makes you feel that you have someone to turn to...I guess I need one now huh?
Never mind...on a lighter note...yesterday's pool game was nice...I won Nina...the better player than me...Nice game Nina...And yeah congrats to teh monday cocky guy...Good game Isnan(of course la..he won 4 games)..I love pool...It gives you a temporary sense of fulfilment...makes you forget for a while what you are facing then and later...
Hanim