I've been receiving comments and assurance these past few months on how good I look... By good I mean the face.

But you know what, I know I look good... but I can't really accept how good I look coz i know, it's just the face and camera angle comes into play when that area is concern.And that beneath that face is a whole lot of mess that I refused to acknowledge and ashamed to show in photos.I guess as confident as I am.. I am still the girl who is big and have some self-esteem issue.

After watching the video of my atrocious singing yesterday, I received an ephiphany. I looked huge and I hate it coz I know I don't want to be that girl.I know I am better than that.

So here I am typing this post... rash and impromptu and I may or may not regret this later... But I need to do something to myself.. not just to look good, but my health needs it too,pronto...

So you my friends as my witness here... I am pledging to lose weight and by next year on my 23rd birthday. I wanna be under 100kg(yes I am that heavy) and have double digits in my weight. So please help me realised this goal and push me coz I know I cant do this myself... and when it comes to exercise and eating right.... you all know I have MAJOR problem in that areas...

So here I am finally expressing and admitting

I AM FAT

and because I love myself... I wanna lose the weight... For myself, for my health and for my family...

And this is a promise to myself that I hope I will make it!

InsyaAllah...

Hanim